My life has been a roller coaster for the past year. For those of you who thought I had it all together…welcome to reality. I have not been myself, to say the least. I have been insecure, intimidated, unstable, overly emotional, irrational…and broke on top of that. And the worst part is…I have been wallowing in my own self-pity for far too long.
Today I write this post with a new attitude. For those of you that may have gotten to know me in the past year or so…I apologize. You have encountered, what I am going to call, the “defeated” side of me. It’s the part of me that walked around defeated, without hope, and waiting for the next discouragement to come along. How sad.
Last night, I picked up Beth Moore’s book, Get Out of That Pit, and read a few pages out of it. I have been reading it off and on for a couple of months now. The chapter that I read explained that many times when we are in a pit (a situation in our life that has caused us spiritual, physical or emotional distress) we just sit in the mud and wallow in our pain as we claim to be “waiting on God’s deliverance”. However, the actual term for “wait” in the context of waiting on God…is the word “expect”.
This concept of “expecting God” to deliver me…instead of just “waiting on God” was a HUGE turning point for me. I realized that God is working…even in our pain…to mold us and prepare us for His will. How amazing, incredible, relieving, and comforting…to know that He is at work. I just need to expect.
“When you did awesome things that we did not look for,
you came down, the mountains quaked at your presence.
From of old no one has heard or perceived by ear,
no eye has seen a God besides you,
who acts for those who wait for him.”
- Isaiah 64:3-4
